Fat again and again but never quitting

Hello everyone! It's been a while since I last posted anything here... Life has been busy, beautiful, chaotic, blessed and filled with smiles and moments to treasure... it has also been pretty fattening for me... Let me tell you a little background...

I've struggled with my weight for a long time... At first it was more of an imaginary struggle, I was the teen that just wanted to be skinny and petite... even when that just wasn't me.... I liked a guy who liked skinny girls so even at a healthy weight I started to obsess about it... that's when my love/hate relationship with food began....

I submitted myself to pills, crazy diets, shots in the "problem areas", etc... I would always lose weight and then I'd gain it all back but then some.... and that... that's exactly when the problem started... every time I reached my goal weight then I'd gain it all back but with additional pounds that weren't there to begin with... and at some point the imaginary issue became a real one... my eating was deeply connected to my emotions... I'd lose weight out of "spite", I'd gain weight out of sadness, I'd lose it to prove a point, I'd gain it because I didn't know how to stay thin! it was crazy...

Fast-forward many years... to 2011 (a husband and 2 beautiful daughters later) I started to change my life for my health not just for the way I looked... I had two girls to care for, to play with, to enjoy life with and to live long for! I wanted to be healthy and enjoy outdoorsy activities with my wonderful husband, life was good and I no longer wanted the quick fix or to impress someone... I wanted to live a good, healthy life and set a good example to my children... I started walking a lot and then running, I counted calories obsessively (not really knowing how food works or anything about nutrition) and I managed to lose 50 pounds... I was on top of the world... But ... I still wasn't happy ... I still wanted to lose weight and I started to realize that after months of intense exercise and watching my calorie intake more than ever the weight just wouldn't budge... I went to doctors who said "well, eat less" (how??)... I was becoming increasingly discouraged and frustrated... what was going on? A doctor even prescribed a low dose of thyroid medicine (Levothyroxine) and mentioned I had thyroid issues... the medication didn't seem to make a difference (except that I just didn't feel quite right)... back then (and as you'll be able to see on this blog) I was an avid baker... I loved sugar, butter, flour! I enjoyed baking often throughout the week and while I didn't eat what I baked I was giving it to my family because well... they didn't have a weight issue... in my desperation I started to read medical books, researched about thyroid and started to look into different eating plans... That's when something clicked! I now learned how food can heal you or make you sick... it's not all about counting calories... especially if what you are pursuing is HEALTH... I also learned how your body "gets used" to a certain level of exercise and you have to "switch things up" a bit for it to work... I loved all this and I now realized that I was hurting my family by feeding THEM sugar and flour.... (I then learned butter was fine! I always thought I had to eat everything LOW FAT! LOW CALORIES!) ... I started to see food differently.... as a source of fuel! I also learned that I am not a slob! (hahahaha).... I learned that while society sees all fat people as undisciplined, lazy cows... we sometimes are the most disciplined of all.... submitting ourselves to painful and even dangerous procedures, diets and medications... many of us are willing to *lose our lives* on an operating table to MAKE THIS FAT GO AWAY! I ALSO learned that while I had read books that made my fatness seem like a spiritual issue IT WAS JUST NOT THAT! I didn't need someone telling me that I was fat because I wasn't going to Jesus when I craved cupcakes!

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I want to make sure I am clear on this... I am not saying that having a relationship with Jesus won't help you through it all.... I am saying that YOUR WEIGHT AND MY WEIGHT can't be blamed on our spiritual lives. Because if "you go there" and you tackle your weight issue as a spiritual issue then ... when the weight doesn't budge or when you "gain it back" now you'll be discouraged for being a double failure... not only in the physical but in the spiritual area too... and I think that's dangerous.

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When we have a weight struggle we all try to find the ONE REASON behind it... the ONE THING that will do the "trick" to help us lose the weight and keep it off.... the truth is that there are SO MANY FACTORS BEHIND IT ... I learned that many of them I CAN'T CONTROL.... and many of them I can.....

Girlfriend, if you're reading this and you've tried everything let me tell you YOU ARE NOT ALONE... I have been there... If you, like me, have gone through phases where you start posting pictures on social media of yourself because you finally start to feel comfortable with the way you look and then at some point there are less and less pictures where you appear and then there is just NONE.... I get it! I've been there! It breaks my heart when I start to see less and less pictures of the people I love and I know have struggled with their weight... because I want to give them a hug and say "I KNOW! I know! It hurts!" I know exactly what they're feeling because either I have felt it or I am feeling it right at that point.

So.... back to where I was.... Like I said... I started to learn about nutrition and exercising... seeing it all differently... and through it all I kept working... pushing through... and I joined a gym I think in 2015 (Life Time Fitness) .... I started to train everyday by myself and occasionally with an amazing trainer... (Aaron Miller)... He taught me about different things I could do and introduced me to strength training.... I had never understood "weights" and now I was using them and actually enjoying them... I started to see my body changed... I lost weight but now that wasn't my only metric... I started to see my body fat go down and my muscle increase...it was awesome! For the first time in my life I felt STRONG... stronger than ever... I wasn't pursing skinny... I was pursing health, strength, muscle definition... I started to understand how with age you want those muscles to protect your joints and bones... Now the whole food=fuel thing made sense... I was eating to fuel my body, to restore, to replenish, I was eating with a purpose... Protein and carbs they all had their place in my life... sugar wasn't even tempting any more... I did things I never thought... it helped me even overcome some fears and set goals not even weight related... My goals were now go climbing or get on a zip line (which I did) ... I felt young! (even at 37!!) and in my "I'm so young" feeling hubby and I thought "let's go for another baby" ... (I am so happy for that!) ... I got pregnant right away... it was 2016 and I thought this would be the easiest, healthiest pregnancies of all ... it wasn't ... somehow I developed gestational diabetes... WHAT??? .... I managed to keep my numbers controlled by not following the doctors' recommendations and diet... I armed myself with a glucometer and my knowledge of food... this would be my chance to prove what I've been doing... and it was! I tested following the doctor's diet... low calories, low fat ... and my sugar went through the roof... I followed my own knowledge of food, how things work... and my numbers were perfect... My doctor said he had never seen such great numbers.... I was ecstatic that regardless of a medical condition I could protect my baby now with my knowledge of all these years of studying and researching....  I then had my baby... a 3rd. C section... things weren't easy inside the operating room.... The doctor was amazed (scared) at how thin my uterus was and how it miraculously didn't rupture... he said "had he known this, there would've been an emergency c-section way sooner" ... he managed to close the uterus... (he explained what he had to do but I won't bore you with that) ... I was recovering and hoping after the delivery I would, naturally, lose weight... but it wasn't the case.... after having my 9 pound 8 oz. baby I went to the dr's office for my 1st check up and huh... I had gained 5 pounds... HOW? 1 month later I was another 15 pounds heavier (than my heaviest at pregnancy!!!) and then I continued to gain.... I went back to the gym trying to give it my all... I went back to my knowledge of food and it just wasn't DOING IT! I continued to see my reflection get bigger and bigger... what in the world happened? My body wasn't doing what it was supposed to....

I have a friend that I work out with and she said "Paloma, I see all you do! I think you should go to the doctor because this isn't normal" she was right... But doctors had disappointed me so many times before... could they help? I decided I would go back to Mexico to see a doctor there.... The private medical practice in Mexico is outstanding... the service is personal, they care to dig to find the real source of the issue.... and an aunt of mine recommended an endocrinologist there... (I thought it had to be my thyroid just like the endocrinologist here in the USA told me)... I set up an appointment....

As I waited for the day to come to go back to Mexico I discovered some classes in my gym.... I started to attend Strictly Strength, Pilates, STRIKE (kickboxing), Life Barre, Barre Fusion and  Zumba. It was challenging for me... My body was against me.... I felt embarrassed, self conscious and just disgusting...

Have you ever felt like you have to explain to people "trust me! I am not a lazy fat person! I really try!!!"? I felt like that.... while other people were doing crunches and planks I was sweating just trying to lift my head from the ground because of the massive body I was trapped in....

One day I hit a new low.... It was a day in July this year (2018) right before my trip to Mexico to see my doctor...

It was my second times trying the Pilates class... where thankfully the lights are dim... and as I sweated and puffed trying to do the challenging movements I started to cry... I could've started sobbing uncontrollably but of course I wasn't going to... I was surrounded by people... thankfully I was sweating so much that you couldn't tell there were so many tears.... but inside of me I was yelling... screaming at every move! Wondering how in the world someone so dedicated like me got to this? I have helped people change their lives around... I have blogs and facebook pages about nutrition, I have held nutrition classes in my home, a friend of mine not only lost weight but her consistent headaches were gone following the tips I shared with her.... and yet... here I was .... reaching the morbidly obese title all while I NEVER STOPPED FIGHTING!!! I didn't deserve this! I should be able to do the movements! and yet... I am an ungraceful mass attempting to do Pilates. I should just have a cheeseburger!

I am letting you in my deepest feelings..... I was hoping nobody could see me.... I was hoping I could just disappear and yet I felt like "the BIG center of attention" ... I reassured myself and told myself "don't worry... it's just your mind! I'm sure nobody notices" ... As the class ended I wanted to run out of there... I picked up my mat and bolted towards the door... when I saw a lady I know... she's sweet and her intentions are good... but given my state... you understand how I felt when I saw her...

She's graceful and slim, she's very outspoken about nutrition and healthy living.... I can't see an ounce of extra weight on her....  She doesn't really know me that well so of course she doesn't know what I've been through....

She stops me... I am in pain inside....

She encouragingly tells me "Paloma, you did a great job... "

I want to disappear

She tells me "We're all in different places in our journey..."

I want to run.... I start to explain... I want her to know... My journey is long... I am not a beginner... I should look like her... not like me....

The worst happens....

I start to cry.... UGH!!! I even start to explain I am going to see a doctor!

She starts to pray for me (I told you ... she's sweet! I just didn't feel I could go through that... not in that moment) ... People are passing by us because we're close to the door..... I didn't want anyone to see me and here I am... being prayed over out loud by the door.... with the mixed feelings of thankfulness for her taking the time to pray for me and try to encourage me and sadness and anger that I am seen LIKE THIS!

I thanked her and disappeared... I couldn't get to my locker quickly enough... I picked up my kids from childcare and got in the car.... now to cry even more.... I got home, wiped my tears away and started cooking lunch... hubby came and I started to tell him... now sobbing....

Praise God for my husband.... He's so good through all of this, encouraging and always tells me how much he admires everything I do... So he just listens while I sob...

And so we started our trip... As I saw the doctor I explain to him what's going on... he sees my lab results (of all the tests he ordered) and tells me there was no way I was going to lose the weight ... I needed help... it's insulin resistance... It is different for everyone as not two people are exactly alike... In my case I just couldn't lose the weight and on the contrary I continue to gain...

I explained my frustration... he listened... I asked all the questions I needed to ask about food/exercise and since his wife is a nutritionist he understands all my questions about proteins and carbs and fats... and when he suggests me to watch the fat intake (for now)  I ask him about the ketogenic diet (which at some point I attempted) and he explains why and how it just wasn't going to do anything for me... finally a doctor took the time to listen and had the full knowledge to answer... He prescribed some medication (metformin) and I explain how I don't want to be on meds my whole life... He tells me I won't have to because if I put the work I say I do ... the time will come when I will be able to continue on my own... I don't want to get my hopes to high but I leave his office with answers and it just made sense...

I continued with my normal routine of exercise and tweak my food intake a bit.... (didn't really change much but I was less wary of carbs) ... And I started to see results....

God has put people in my life that have been amazingly NEEDED in this process... not only my doctor has been helpful through this all, my husband, my beautiful children, my friends, the person who prayed when I felt like hiding, my siblings, my parents but also my instructors... I am going to say particularly Annika!

That short girl that is fiery as nobody else... She deceives you into doing "just one more" (don't trust her though), she pushes you, challenges you and gets you to do what you thought you couldn't do....

It was through her STRIKE (kickboxing) class that I knew I needed her in my life.... As I went to her first class and I heard her speak... I wondered if everyone else was feeling like me... Each class is like a breakthrough session... like a therapy through physical movements....  I wondered who else was facing their demons through her class as she yells "punch him in the face!" ... because as she says... "your enemy might not be a person" ... And every time I am in her class I do... I punch my fears, my I can'ts, my insecurities and my negative self image, I punch the guy that followed me and my girls at a store and took pictures of us, I punch the voices of people (or a person) who once put me down.... and I get goosebumps and as the class ends I get the feeling of being a winner... I get to lift my arms in victory because regardless of it all and everything you've read... I am a winner... hey ... not everyone "sticks with it" after years and years... I am no quitter, I am stronger than I might appear on the outside... and like my oldest daughter once told me "mommy! You just never stop!"

Because while my body might not show it... My girls have seen it... and while I don't look like the "example of health" I AM the very example that I wanted to set for them... to fight, to not make excuses, to overcome and to keep going no matter what...

Have I felt like quitting? Many times!!! I am far from perfect and if it wasn't for the support I have I probably would've quit already.... There are times where I have actually thrown in the towel and eaten what I shouldn't  but then I pick the towel back up and keep going. Not because I am special.... Everyone can do it.

I told my doctor it's hard to continue when I see no results and he said...

"oh but you do see results! If you weren't exercising and eating the way you do you would be diabetic right now.... because of what you do you're NOT"

See... eating healthy and exercising and taking care of yourself is never without reward... You deserve it!

I have so much to say... And while I am thinking of writing a book or starting a group or a page or something... For now I tell you...


If you have weight issues it doesn't mean...

You're lazy
You're not disciplined
You're less spiritual than...
You're a failure....

Just like not every skinny person is hardworking, spiritually "there", disciplined or a success....

We can't generalize.... ever... Your issues are not my issues... I can't pretend to understand exactly what you've done, I can't say "you're fat because...." and simplify it into ONE thing ... it might be even outside of you....

Genes, leptin, fat cells, age, etc... all play a role... in my case that last pregnancy, at my age, with my medical history, hereditary factors all caused the perfect storm and at some point no matter what I did I still needed something external to come in and interfere....

And right now... while I have lost 30 pounds (since July 20th 2018) and I strive towards losing many more.... (many many) and while I hope to be able to keep all the pounds off I know it will always be something I struggle with.... for me (like my doctor said) it will always be an uphill battle... and I know for many people it is the same way...

Do not get discouraged... keep fighting...

You're not alone in this! Don't compare yourself to others... If keto doesn't work... You're not doing something wrong... it might just not be for YOU. Remember... When it comes to weight loss and health NOT ONE THING works for everyone... What might be good for others might not be fore you...   you might have to tweak things a bit for yourself... Are there plans I recommend? Of course... My favorite ones are:

Trim Healthy Mama
The Fast Metabolism Diet
The Paleo Diet
The Whole30

And if you want to get all into it (like I did) and learn about the science behind it all... I absolutely recommend this book:


Hungry Gene: The Science of Fat and the Future of Thin


You'll learn so much from all these books ... But again, take your time with it all... Be consistent and see what works best for you specifically.

And here's a picture of me.... still with lots of pounds to lose, still far from where I want to be but celebrating the fact that I am healthier and never quitting... and the fact that I entered these jeans again!

Thanks again to everyone who has been supportive through all my stages... thanks again Anikka for being MY trainer... because if you go to her class.... she's YOUR trainer (no matter how PACKED that room is!).

If you're trying this alone... Don't do it... Surround yourself with support! I'm here for you! If at least as comfort to know that someone "gets it".

© Paloma K.

Disclaimer: This post contains may contain affiliate links. Which means that if you follow a link a buy a product I get a small percentage of the purchase. It doesn't cost you more. I am not paid to recommend any of these products, these are my actual, real, personal opinions.

God is working... Will you join Him?

I think it was about a year ago (or two maybe? Not sure) when I had the opportunity to do the Experiencing God Bible Study with the Ladies Group at my church... It was really, really good... God used it to speak to many of us in such a powerful way that a few even took radical decisions and made drastic changes that would impact their lives and their families.... One recurrent point made throughout this study is that God is at work... always... and we can join Him in what He's already doing... And I just want to share with you about something wonderful that is going on right now in our group....

I am part of this amazing Ladies Bible Study group... We have a different study every Spring and every Fall... The ladies that I serve with are amazing... They truly are a gift in my life! I felt so connected to all of them even from the first time I met them... I knew I was meant to be there! But just recently I started to feel like we should have a "Spanish group" be part of our Study... Now... this is not an "original idea" or something that I can take credit for... This has been done in the past... but for one reason or another it never came to completely take form... Of course ... It is hard! It's not a "Spanish speaking church" ... so that made me doubt it was even a "good idea"... I wondered if it was just "my wanting to do this Spanish thing" just of my own desire... BUT... I checked in my heart and I realized I actually kind of "didn't want to do it" ... I was happy with my group of people I already knew ... I didn't want to get out of my comfort zone! You might think a "Spanish group" would be my comfort zone... but these would be people I didn't know... and I wanted to be with the friends I already knew. Regardless of the doubts I still I brought it up to the Women's Ministry leader (our church is amazing and they support you SO MUCH)... but I even had a condition... I would support the Spanish group if somebody else would do it with me... (I even had a name who I wanted that person to be!) Thankfully that other person (and dear friend) accepted the challenge and even when we both didn't know what this would look like, and we didn't know what to even expect or how many women would sign up we both agreed and said "yes"...

There were a couple of months of "registration" and when the FIRST DAY of Bible Study came, my friend and I were a little nervous (I could actually say I was EMBARRASSED to even have "suggested" to do something like this) because only ONE other lady signed up!

Was this really necessary? Did I just make the "need" of a Spanish group up? Maybe it was just a "wishful thought"? I felt bad for any logistics involved with planning for an extra group and buying BOOKS IN SPANISH for this study... 12 books were bought! 1 lady signed up??? I knew my Spanish speaking neighbor would come too (she said so...) So at least we might have two! My friend and I looked at each other that day and said: "I wonder who else will come" and there we were... Ready to serve the 1 or 2 ladies that would show up...

That day... as we sat in our classroom... We used 12 books... Yes... 12 Books! And as of today we officially have 14 ladies in our group!

That very first day, when we introduced ourselves with one another and shared a little bit about why we were there and what we expected from the Study... the theme was the same... each of the ladies said "I was hoping for something like this" "I was praying for a Spanish group" "I was needing this" "I was looking for this" ... God was at work! Way before I even thought "I had the idea of a Spanish group"... it was His idea all the time! And He had already been working in the hearts of those that would join! All my friend and I did was jump in the wagon that was already moving! (We both did a little happy dance at the end of that day). 


I am tempted to share with you a picture of these beautiful ladies but I already did the "impulsive thing" of sharing it on my personal facebook.... I don't want to go further and share a picture with them on my blog without their consent and don't want to put them on the spot... But these ladies are so beautiful, genuine, witty, open, wise and smart! So thirsty for God and so faithful! I never expected we would have a big, great,  awesome group like this... BUT GOD!

He is working and He'll continue to add the ones He wants to add!

You want to know what Study we are doing? We are doing the Children of the Day: 1 & 2 Thessalonians by Beth Moore. And it's really hitting home in so many areas of our lives! I highly recommend it!

Are you "sensing" God wants you to do something? Is it out of your comfort zone and that makes you doubt? Just pray... believe... trust and obey! ... He's working at it before you even start! Before you even think you want to start! Will you join Him???

Experiencing God Bible Study




Children of the Day Bible Study



Paloma

Disclaimer: Some links in this post are affiliate links, this means that you pay the same price, but I also receive a very small compensation. I recommend products I have tried and love.

Baked oatmeal, earth milk and lots of love

Hello everybody! I don't know exactly what I was waiting to try the wonderful baked oatmeal recipe from Mrs. Dirinda! If you are not on the Trim Healthy Mama FB groups you probably don't know who I am talking about.... but I can tell you... she's super awesome! I love her encouraging posts, her upbeat attitude, her willingness to share with everyone and help us all! Hey... there are so many wonderful ladies in that group I can't even mention names because it would be a long list. I am making great solid friendships... like with beautiful Teresia from Nana's Little Kitchen, Vikki Rey (she's now my fb friend on my personal account too!), Dally T (who I think just started on this journey but she's a fighter, she goes with everything...  I know she's going to succeed!) and I enjoy her posts and comments very much.... well... many wonderful people like that and many others that I look forward to getting to know even more like amazing Briana Thomas who is wise beyond her years, love her strength, faith, peacefulness and her food!!! or Sarah from Mrs. Criddle's Kitchen who is welcoming and thoughtful, Jennifer from A Home with a Purpose... administrator extraordinaire, loving and caring... and... I told you! Don't get me started with the names or I'll never end! They're all a great bunch!

Anyway... My point here is that after what I now know was TOO LONG... I made Mrs. Dirinda's delicious, scrumptious and oh so filling! Baked Oatmeal ... If you haven't tried it ... you are missing out!!! that stuff is yummy! I don't know why I waited so long to try it! The recipe calls for almond milk and I made it with cashew milk, but everything else I followed to the T! I can't wait to try the so many variations that exist or that I can create as well! This one is a keeper!

Oatmeal... I love you!

I've been such a good girl today that I also made "Earth Milk" ... Thank God for my wonderful Ninja Blender

You could say "I'm on a roll"... it was simple to make and it's so good to be able to chug your veggies when you want to add more into your daily intake! But "drinking earth milk" is NOT something you HAVE TO DO on this plan... You can if you want to... you don't NEED it to succeed... I liked it but I must admit it doesn't look like the most inviting of drinks you'll have on plan! (It's really not bad though... and it's charged with super foods!) If you've been on THM and haven't made it yet... Try it... The recipe is in the book on page 425 ... What? You don't have the book? Amazon has it for cheaper now... This is a BEST SELLER for a reason. It is a great investment!

If you are still not convinced on why you need the book if you can get "all the info you need" off of pinterest, the groups, the charts, etc... you really are in for a disappointment... The information will not make sense, you will end up confused, frustrated and feeling like "this doesn't work either"... I go into more depth on why you need the book here and here


Well... I hope I convinced you to take a step on the right direction... whether it is to try a new recipe, to buy the book, to join the facebook group ... anything!  

And you...

Paloma K.

 Disclaimer: Some links in this post may be affiliate links, this means that you pay the same price, but I also receive a very small compensation. I recommend products I have tried and love.

The heart of the problem!

This heart is OK

  "The heart of the human problem is the problem of the human heart" - J. John

I heard this quote today on my way home after my walk/talk with my bestie... (in our talks we fix the problems of the world, we laugh, we ... well.. I am not going to go into details but I can tell you that today we even heard an 80's country song) so... during our walk today I had a few moments of "self-discovery" ... I was left thinking about the things I do and say... (oh yes... we go deep!), as soon as I got in the car I heard this "heart" quote and I was so thankful, God always finds ways to let me know He is listening, He cares and He knows of my struggles or shortcomings... I liked the quote so much that I thought I had to share...  The human heart is deceitful indeed, that's what the Bible says... the core, the source of all issues lies within the human heart. Every problem can be traced back to it... Whether it is an addiction, our self-image, etc... when the focus is on self and not the Lord, when we follow the "listen to your heart" advice we fall into the biggest trap! It sounds good to "trust the heart" but the heart is not that cute thing we draw, the heart is not that beautiful Valentine cookie of the picture... the heart is  "...deceitful above all things..." Jer. 17:9 and how could we trust the very thing that gets us in the most trouble? How can we trust the very thing that has failed time after time, generation after geneartion!?

Society tells us to "follow our heart" or "do what we think is right" ... it even sounds like a "new thing", like a "wise thing" but humans have been following that very "modern" concept since the beginning! we find time after time in the Bible, generations that were completely destroyed for "doing what was right in their own eyes", strong men of God completely destroyed for "listening to their heart" and going after the wrong woman, kings leading the people of God after false gods, fathers hurting their children for letting them do as they wanted, battles lost for following "intuition" rather than God's voice....

And yet... we want to "re-write history" and we think this "follow your heart" thing is going to somehow "work for US"

I, like you, will continue to struggle with things... just like everybody else... But today my prayer is that I will listen to God... rather than my heart.  May God continue to transform me where my focus is more and more on Him and less and less on me... less and less on others. May I listen to His voice rather than my own. May I continue to grow as He continues to complete His work in me.



© Paloma K.

Obedience supersedes my rights....

It is Friday and I feel like writing... It's been a bit since my last post... and I've been thinking of "awesome blog posts" (yeah, right) and yet I don't seem to be able to put them into words (so there's no real proof of it!)... But... I guess one of the "consistent" thoughts in my mind has been the following: "Obedience supersedes my freedom of speech"

In this day and age we are becoming all too used to "saying exactly what we think, right in the moment when we think about it" ... With Facebook, Twitter and all the "instant social media" we are all too tempted to just "type away" our thoughts... (And here I am ... you see? doing it again! But bear with me... I've been giving this some thought... at least I've waited a few months to actually say it)... It seems we all have something "too important" to say that will either:

a). Impress everyone
b). Shock everyone
c). Enlighten everyone
d). Get everyone concerned
d). Change someone else's mind


 I do agree that posting things away (and right away) is way too tempting, I've fallen prey to this temptation in more occasions than I care to admit... But I've seen way too many times conflicts arise from our lack of "filtering what we say" (what *I* say).

I think the speed of our fingers has finally caught up with the speed of our tongue... and this "fire from hell" (James 3:6b)  is now at the tip of our fingers as well... burning it all in the name of "I have a right to express myself" ... Do we have a right to express ourselves? Absolutely! (And I praise God for it! I, like all of you, need my space to vent and express my ideas) but does this right nullifies my responsibility to esteem others above myself? I do not think so...

I have been caught up in way too many more than one occasion in uncomfortable circumstances where I've said something that hurt somebody else whether I meant it or not... the tongue is a "world of iniquity that defiles the whole body" (James 3:6a) but now with our phones and computers it is too easy and too quick to  share exactly what we're feeling in the very exact moment we're feeling it, like it is crucial for the world to hear and know exactly what's going on in my head, whatever the consequences, not minding those around us that could be insulted, offended, hurt by our statements or to even get the wrong impression from us (let's admit it... writing things down gives room for a lot of confusion and misunderstandings, the reader in general, will add the tone that he/she thinks in his/her head)... Now... are we going to be able to spare everyone's feelings? Are we always responsible for how people take what we say or how we feel? Of course not... but just setting some filters would be very beneficial... and I am talking for myself! (I've sometimes gone through those filters 'afterwards' and had to delete some of the things I've written, sadly sometimes it's been too late).

And I guess one of the best filters we can use, of course, is from the Word of God:

Philipians 2:1-4 "If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies, Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others."


Not everything we write on Fb or twitter has to be of "supreme relevance" of course, we can be fun or silly... making someone smile is not irrelevant... I'm not even saying anything about "not posting baby pictures" (please! Keep 'em coming!) or "food pictures" (hey! I need to take those!) just making sure that in our "freedom of speech" and right to use "our space" online, we don't forget that there's a world watching us... 

So let's not even accept ideas like: "It's MY timeline" "It's MY wall" "It's MY life" ... if we've been bought for a price... if we are not owners of our very lives... can't we give HIM those other little things? aren't they also His?

My Prayer: Lord, it's me again, Paloma, I pray that this message will be read in the way that I intended for it to sound, in love and not in judgment, for I, myself, am guilty of failing to esteem others better than myself way too many times, forgive me if I said anything that doesn't please you and let Your Word that I shared here produce fruit in my heart and in the hearts of those that read it,  "Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer." (Psalm 19:14) 

© Paloma K.

The Pink Cake

Hello everybody, here I am again, with my monthly post! I feel weird to not be as active blogging here but I hope to be able to "get back at it" soon! Not much is going on here, we still have ONE car only, I mentioned 1 of our cars got stolen in my last post, we don't see the possibility of buying another car anytime soon... My 2 yr. old is potty trained! It took me a day! but I shouldn't say it took "ME" I should say that with God's help and with her good attitude this was done quickly! She only had 1 real day of being trained, three days ago, after that she hasn't had any accidents EVEN AT NIGHT! It's amazing that she just "GOT IT" she even wakes up in the middle of the night and lets me know she needs to go potty! What a big girl! It's a little bittersweet I must admit, as I see her grow up so quickly makes me realize I no longer have a "baby" ... But let's not talk more about potty training, especially because we're about to start talking about CAKE!... it's time to reveal the "cake of the month" ... as you know I bake with


 Which by the way, we're now on Facebook too! LIKE us here. Well, we, The Cake Slice Bakers, have to bake 1 different cake each month, as you may or many not know, this year we're baking from the book Vintage Cakes by Julie Richardson, and it's been awesome! None of the cakes has disappointed, pretty much everyone has enjoyed each of the cakes so far and that makes me very happy! For May the Cake that won the "poll" was "The Pink Cake" which is a triple layered chocolate cake with a Raspberry Buttercream... I voted for this cake, and the cakes that I vote for usually never win LOL! so I was thrilled to try this one! I must say I was tempted to change the raspberries for strawberries because I am not that big of a fan for raspberries... but I usually like to adhere to the recipe just as it is, even when it calls for ingredients I would not normally use because I see it as an opportunity to try things that might not be my favorite or that I am not so "sure" of... and sometimes I get great results (not always) but I am happy to say that I am definitely happy it worked this time!

The intense color of the raspberries gave the frosting its beautiful pink (and totally natural) color and delicious fragrance! Plus the fact that the raspberries are pureed and strained to remove the seeds "did the trick" and made them "the special ingredient" of this cake! giving it a slight tart freshness that went great with the deep chocolate flavor of the cake.

I went for something simple and decided to make 2 9" layers instead of 3 8"

 I thought this cake would be perfect to have for hubby's birthday... I know it looks a lot like a very girly cake but trust me... any man that is not afraid to have "The Pink Cake" for his birthday will really enjoy it!

I used fresh raspberries for decoration

My husband wasn't sure if he'd like it or not, he's not a fan of raspberries either and he's just happy to have "chocolate on chocolate" kind of desserts... but he trusted me and he was actually shocked by the results, when he had the first bite he actually dropped his hands on the table in actual disbelief, his jaw dropped as well and he just managed to say "this is awesome"

he enjoyed it so much!

Dear friends of ours enjoyed the cake with us, they liked it very much as well.

Our friends Venessa and Bill were happy to enjoy this cake with us!

I am so happy with this cake, it will definitely be one of those "go to" recipes, plus it's pretty simple to make.

It's great that hubby's birthday is in May because I got to have a slice for Mother's Day as well!

If you would like the recipe for this cake, I encourage you to get this book! Really do! You will not regret it! If you love good cakes this is a must have!



© Paloma K.

Better late than never - Almond Streamline Cake with Lemon Custard

Hello everybody! Yes... I am back! At least I am faithful to post something once a month! Don't you think? Everything here is going well, I am running and preparing for my first 5k which will be on Saturday, the girls are growing, hubby's work is good.... oh wait... well... his car got stolen last week... but .... that's another story! Let's focus on our blessings! :D

So... today... I am going to share with you about "April's Cake" ... as you know... I am part of The Cake Slice Bakers  (find us on Facebook here) and I should've posted about our latest cake on the 20th... so I am a little late but here I am and that's what matters...

This month... the "winner cake" was an "Almond Streamliner Cake with Lemon Custard" from the Vintage Cakes Book by Julie Richardson, it is such a great book and all the recipes have worked for me so far! I didn't vote for this cake because hubby doesn't really love "lemony desserts" so I was actually a little "bummed" when this cake was chosen... I think the same thing happened last month... LOL! But we're a team so I still joined the group and baked it... I usually try to share my cake with friends... I just invite everyone who wants some cake to come to my house for cake and coffee (an open house kind of thing) and they come, children and everything for some good conversation and a sweet treat! I hadn't done this since last year because of Holidays... but once Easter was done I knew it was time to re-start my tradition.... And like usual I had a great turn out!

I decided to also make sugar cookies, brownies and chocolate cake to share with kids... and had the greatest time with wonderful, wonderful people!

This cake calls for Almond Paste which I had never used and I am so happy to have discovered this ingredient! Some of the ladies from our group even made their own paste, I just bought it but I will make sure I make my own next time I bake something with it! (There'll be definitely a next time) ... I must say that my almond paste gave the cake a delicious fragrance and just a subtle hint of "Amaretto flavor" in the background... it was very good! Everyone seemed to enjoy it (I hope they weren't just being nice) and most of the Cake Slice Bakers have agreed this cake is a keeper... My husband (as expected) didn't like it at all... but again... that's something I knew would happen because of the lemon custard (that man only wants chocolate! LOL!)

So... here we go with some pictures (If you want the recipe for this cake visit: my friend Anne and her blog "From My Sweet Heart"

 © Paloma K.

The Cake Slice and The Classic Cake

Hello everybody! Sorry I haven't been around as much... I am doing good stuff though! Being a mom and enjoying the terrible two's -OY!- but it's all a blessing, even those little things that now frustrate me... I know it's just a stage and this too shall pass and I might soon look back and feel like it passed way too quickly!

So... as many of you know I belong to a Secret Online Baking Group called The Cake Slice, we are a group of ladies who love baking and we choose a different book each year to bake from, right now we are baking from "Vintage Cakes" by Julie Richardson and it's been such a joy to bake from this book!

For January, two of the 4 cakes to choose from were tied at the end... so we had the choice to bake either of them... I chose "The Classic" and I am glad I did... I actually talked to a friend (Laurie) about it and about the fact that I can't really eat much cake anyway... and she had the great idea to use it for her hubby's birthday! They're all great friends so we made it a "date" and we all had lunch at her house yesterday with her family to enjoy her food and my cake... her husband really enjoyed it and my husband was almost like he was in heaven... he couldn't stop saying how much he loved it!

I am not sharing the recipe this time... but I am sharing with you "the process" of making it... I hope it's still fun!

My first two layers actually sunk! I was distracted and used baking soda instead of baking powder!

Chocolate ganache in the making! Semisweet chocolate + heavy whipping cream + dark brown sugar = awesomeness!

Second batch of cake layers were great! The recipe asked to make 4 layers out of the two but I used bigger round pans and preferred to have 2 thick layers than 4 thin ones.

This would've been the final product but I thought it looked too simple and dark....

So I gave it an extra touch with melting some white chocolate with butter and heavy cream to decorate the top.

Here's the birthday boy waiting for his wife to give him a slice!

Now... this is a cake slice! although it was supposed to be "yellow cake" and I found it "whiter than yellow" Delicious though!

Success!

© Paloma K.

A special Birthday!

Today is the birthday of a very dear friend, interestingly, for some reason, my brain decided to never remember her birthday... at least that was the case for many years, until last year "the curse ended" and I could finally remember on the exact day! January 7th!


This friend has been my friend for a long time, we've been friends in the silliness of the teenage years, through the "I like that boy" times and through the "I don't know if I should dye my hair or buy shoes" troubles!  As we grew older our friendship has grown stronger... we've been there for each other forever! She's been my "clothes shopping encourager", my "shoulder to cry on" when I've been sad. Her home has been like mine always! You know? She's been that friend that you just "drop by unannounced" and know "it's ok" we can talk about everything, even things that are "touchy" for each other and even if we ever got upset or anything... things always go back to normal! She sees the good in me and the bad too, we understand each other and I love making her laugh! LOL! it's very funny because I make her laugh so hard that sometimes it's like she's going to cry! She's also my "petite friend" ... so my mom used to say that together we looked like "Snoopy and the little yellow bird" LOL! ... I wonder which one I am! ... Growing up we were "expert parents" we knew it all, we even talked about the things that "we would never let our children do" and now that we have children we laugh at each other when we remember how foolish we actually were! we had no clue! And as our children yell in the background when we talk over the phone we can do nothing but try to comfort each other with an "I understand" LOL!

Ah! My friend! It's awesome having friends like that! I'll never forget the periods of my life that were the hardest... and again... she was there... through the nightmares I went through... she was there... (she is also married to someone that's always been a great friend too... so... they've both been there!) and now that everything is good and wonderful... she is still there! I pray everybody gets to have a friend like this... and in my selfishness I want to wish her MANY, MANY, MANY Happy Birthdays... Because I need my friend for many, many, many more years! Until we're all old and wrinkly and when I make her laugh we even forget what we're laughing about!

Happy Birthday Tere!

Tere... we all went "blueberry picking" when they came to spend vacations with us.

Our families together!

So... to wish her a happy birthday I am also going to invite you to her Etsy Shop! She is also crafty! She makes beautiful bows, hairbands and accessories for girls... here it is: http://www.etsy.com/shop/2PetitesFilles

© Paloma K.

Happy Dia de Reyes!

© Paloma K.

Christmas Cookies - Do you have the right baking sheets?

Hello everybody! Welcome to another post here at The Coffee Shop! It is being harder than I thought to get back into blogging! but we must do it! So... have you already planned some Christmas cookie baking? These are the days when Cookie Exchange Parties take place... I used to have this sort of tradition with a friend in Wisconsin, we would get together and bake cookies... I also tried to bake with hubby's aunts... although... for some reason we didn't do much baking together the last year I was there... It's just a busy time for everybody! This time, living now in Texas... I have already been invited to a cookie exchange.... we must all bring four dozens of cookies and share with everyone (along with the recipe) ... sounds cool and fun! But I know I am going to miss baking with my friend from Wisconsin, Ashley, so we are both going to try to bake this Thursday, so we at least get to bake the same day, even if we're far away. 

Her oldest son, then about 9 months old and my oldest daughter a 15 months old, playing while we bake

The "materials"

Here she is!

So... now, that we approach those dates... I'll be sharing some cookie recipes... But first I wanted to know if you have the right baking sheets... You must make sure you have aluminum cookie sheets and baking pans/sheets (avoid non-stick sheets because aluminum bakes more evenly as heat is distributed better throughout the sheet/pan). Cookie sheets are different from baking sheets, cookie sheets do NOT have rolled edges like baking sheets do, they are perfect for cookies because of the larger surface area but of course you can't roast on them because they can't keep any juices in. Just make sure to line your sheets/pans with parchment paper or a French nonstick baking mat to avoid your baked goods to have any metallic taste from the overheated aluminum.

I thought I would share a video that I found from our friends of America's Test Kitchen (now Cooks' Country)... I really trust them, their advice and recipes... so watch it and hopefully you'll find it helpful! Not only for cookie baking... but also for other dishes...



Tomorrow I'll start sharing cookie recipes! Stay tuned!

© Paloma K.

Happy Thanksgiving

Paloma K.

Coffee Friday that is Lick the Bowl Good!

Hello everybody! Welcome to another edition of our Coffee Friday Party! I am so happy and excited for you being here! Having a cup of coffee with us! Choosing "The Coffee Shop" as a place to stop by, enjoy and make friends! Thank you! I hope you added some coffee on any of your posts this week so you can also link up at the end of our post! Now, let's talk about our featured blogger a little bit:

In Mexico, we have an expression that goes "Estamos de manteles largos" which the translation would be like "we are using our finest tablecloth" and it means that we are in great company and we have a very special guest today to share a cup of coffee with us and while having coffee she is also sharing a bit about herself and her family... I must admit I haven't really talked to Monica as much as I'd like to, there are many bloggers I really want to get to talk to more but -sigh- life, interruptions, commitments, etc... just keep getting in the way of me communicating more and commenting more... But I think I know her blog all the way through! I've been known to stare at the monitor just mesmerized by her food, it always looks so good! By her recipes and by her beautiful little boy! I've laughed and cried with her posts, she has such a big heart and she is someone you really wish you could talk to in person (while having some dessert that she of course made!) When I read her blog I feel like I am right there in her kitchen (I so wish I could! and hold cute Hayden too or see him play with my littlest girl!) I encourage you to stop by her Lick The Bowl Good Blog (it certainly is that good!) and thank her for sharing with us today! Hopefully you'll get to love her, her family and her blog as much as I do... Here she is:

Me (Monica) and my 1 year old son, Hayden

Hi, I'm Monica from Lick The Bowl Good! I am honored that Paloma asked me to be a guest blogger for Coffee Fridays because I love her and I love coffee! I've been blogging for about 5 years now and have photographed and baked hundreds of recipes on my blog, some of them flops but many of them are winners and have become staples in my household. Many of my favorites include anything with chocolate, cream cheese, cinnamon and coffee. And strawberries, and blueberries and lemon and butter. Heck I love it all! 

This is my mom's coffee mug. It's one of my favorites because it reminds of her when I was a kid. She's had it for a couple decades and while it has a couple nicks and stains on it, it still holds so many memories for me and is my mug of choice when I enjoy coffee at her house. So today as I pour myself a strong cuppa (with raw sugar and half and half) I hope you'll be inspired to get in the kitchen and bake up a special coffee infused treat for your loved ones. Thanks for inviting me to have coffee with you Paloma!

1. Kahlua Cake

2. Brooklyn Blackout Cake

3. Mocha Frappe Pie

4. White Chocolate Espresso Icebox Cake

5. Coffee-Cocoa Cake

6. Vietnamese Coffee Ice Cream

7. Triple Chocolate Cheesecake

8. Mississippi Mud Cake with Espresso Bourbon Glaze

9. Tiramisu

10. Coffee Chocolate Chip Muffins

11. Pumpkin Spice Latte

12. Chocolate Cake with Mocha Cream Cheese Frosting

13. Coffee Heath Bar Cake

14. Cinnamon Squares

15. Cappuccino Shortbread

I am sure her post has inspired you to start baking or at least to go through her recipes! They are all so inviting and so yummy! I've made a few myself and they are all trustworthy ... you never have to guess if "they really work" oh they do!

Thank you Monica for accepting my invitation to be our Featured Blogger today!


© Paloma K.